Parent: I have a lot of time alone with my 3 y/o son. I find I’m losing my temper faster when there’s no one else around. I try to be scream free and quickly forget. I don’t want him to remember me as a screaming mum. Can you help me?
Jackie Hall: Anger and anxiety are often very closely linked. Anxiety is all about control. We are trying to control life so it goes to my plan and prevent anything from jeopardising our goals.
ALL stress is a conflict between belief (what I’m thinking) and reality (what is actually happening) and what we perceive that event to mean about ourselves. In order to stop the anger we need to align with the reality of that moment and look at it from a reality based perspective.
With any aged child we need to expect as parents that life isn’t always going to go to plan. Our children are learning how to behave and especially at the age of three, they are not going to comply with what we are saying or doing at all times. They are busy integrating loads of information about life and forming physical neural connections in the brain that are helping them make sense in the world and sometimes they’re busy just trying to figure out what things are, let alone trying to align them with you wants and needs.
Check out this website www.raisingchildren.net.au to see what is happening in your child’s brain development and some strategies to handle the reality of this stage.