Tag Archives for " patience "

I Stopped Myself From Having One Of ‘Those’ Mornings

This morning was one of those chaotic, can’t find anything, running late, have to get out the door on time, kids have the shits kind of morning. You know the ones. They can potentially lead to you having just as big a meltdown as the kids.

Except, instead of just getting over it, like the kids do, these mornings tend to leave you feeling really guilty all day because of how you treated your kids.

These are the types of thoughts that went on in my head to change the default thinking that usually sends me into anger.

  • This is just one of ‘those’ mornings. It’s not a reflection of the rest of my day (or my life).
  • The reality is that Ryan can’t find his shoes so I’m going to have to help him look for them. Now where could they be?
  • Jackie, stop! The reality is that Ryan (8yo) has woken up in a feral mood. Do you really think shouting at him and getting angry is going to get him out of it? Just give him a hug instead. Get out of the world of you and your ‘late-ness’ and focus on Ryan and what he needs from you right now. You know this is more likely to speed him up.
  • Seriously, how much later am I really going to be. Is it really going to matter if I’m 15 minutes late. Calm down. Take a step back and focus on what we need to do. The reality is, this morning didn’t go to plan.  It happens. Move on.
  • When I finally get out the door, these moments are going to be a thing of the past. It won’t even matter by this afternoon.
  • Change the picture! I know you wanted the dishes done before you left, but today, it’s just not going to happen. That’s okay. Life will go on and that doesn’t matter either.

Oh yes, I’m going to say it again:

 All stress is conflict between beliefs (what you’re thinking) and reality.

Notice your thoughts that send you into stress and anger and practice pulling your attention into alignment with reality by accepting what is in front of you, looking at it from the perspective of the bigger picture and get solution focused about it.

In the grand scheme of things, will it really matter in one year’s time?

Keeping it real…

Jackie

Why Your Child’s Emotions Won’t Be Rational

“Your child’s behaviour is not rational….”
Quote from a website (can’t remember where, sorry)

I read this quote in an article on child behaviour and I remember thinking, “That is so true!”

Before the age of about 5/6 years of age, all the information our child is getting is going straight into the subconscious for processing, catogerising and understanding life. They are creating filters to enable them to interpret life. Basically, they’re trying to figure out how life even works.

Children need to create these filters before they can learn to get to the point of being able to judge, reason and use logic to determine their responses (behaviour).

Your child’s behaviour won’t be rational because rationale is a function of the conscious brain, and before the age of 5/6 years of age, that ability hasn’t even really come into full swing.

We need to be patient with the reality of where our child’s behaviour is at and stop expecting them to live through our 20/30/40 something years of logic and reasoning skills (heck, even we aren’t entirely logical about our reactions – drinking, smoking, chocolate habits…ring any bells?)

Keeping it real.

Jackie

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