We have now reached the final step on the Mind TRACK To Happiness Process – Know your Plan & action it. It is important to have a plan for how you are going to get to your goal.
In the last step you looked at all of the options you had available and worked towards choosing what works for you, your family and your situation.
Now you want to take this information and break it down into do-able steps. Too many times we become overwhelmed with what we need to do and we end up giving up because it is too hard. Having a plan gives you clear instructions on how you are going to implement the steps you need to take to achieve your aim.
Let’s say, for example you had the aim to clean your house and de-clutter it. You would need to create a reasonable schedule of how you could do this. You would need to list all of the things that you needed to do to complete this mission and put a reasonable time frame on it. Work on doing one room at a time, every few days or every day, depending on your available time. As you get to each room you would tick off that you have done that room.
The idea of this step is to list each step in order and then mark them off as you achieve them. It’s like setting smaller goals within the bigger goal. With each completed mini goal you will see that you are moving closer and closer to your desired aim. Without this plan and the mini-goals it contains, it may feel like you are getting nowhere and you may become discouraged or overwhelmed.
Creating a vision board or a visual step by step plan can help remind you of where you are at on your path towards meeting your aim. Use inspiring pictures and wording to keep you motivated and inspired as you keep going. Tick off each step and write the words ‘thank you’ over the top in black pen to show you that you have achieved a mini goal and appreciate how far you have progressed.
As I said at the beginning of this week, with each brick you place, you get closer to completing the building. Unfortunately we live in a get your life right world that teaches us that we should be able to get what we want, when we want it. However this is not reality. Some things take time and there are steps that need to be taken in order to achieve our aims. Most of the time there is no easy way out. But this is the beauty of learning.
Know that with every action you take, you are contributing to the final goal. And what’s going to happen when you get that goal? Sure, you’ll feel good about your accomplishments, but then what? What do you do then? You will set another goal. This is what we do in life. We set goals and we learn on our way to the goal. Sometimes we get what we want and feel fantastic. Other times we don’t get our goals and we get more learning. We reset our goals and try again with this new information that we’ve just learnt. This is the cycle of life and goals.
How to apply the ‘Know your Plan’ step:
Take the option that you decided on in step 4 – Choices and create a step by step plan of what you need to do to get to your aim.
Include in your plan what you need to organise, who you need to communicate with, what equipment or supplies you need to get, if you need to book something, if you need to buy something, if you need to organise babysitters, make appointments and each action you need to implement along your path to reaching your aim.
Create a vision board or a visual plan that you can put up around the house or in a place that you will see it often, complete with motivational quotes and pictures that will keep you inspired and passionate about achieving your goal.
Tick off each step on your plan as you complete it, for it will make you feel like you are getting closer to your goal.
Summary to The Mind TRACK to Happiness Process
You have now come to the end of the overview to the Mind TRACK to Happiness Process. I have now taught you each step in minor detail so that you can attempt to start using this process in your life. Please know that there is a lot more information to get through yet, so don’t feel discouraged if you are having difficulty in applying some of these steps thoroughly, especially step two – reality. We have a lot of ground to cover that will help you to change your mindset to be in alignment with reality and this doesn’t just happen by reading a few pages of information. I need to show you many ways that this reality step can be implemented, as with the other steps too.
For now, while you are in the learning stages, use the process to become more aware of how you are thinking and how differently you feel when you apply this process even to the small, minor parts to your life.
To start with, just try to become aware of your thinking and how it makes you feel. Remind yourself that these thoughts are only your memes taught to you by the ignorant minds of others and that they do not define who you are. (Step One – Thoughts)
Then try to challenge your mind by seeking out other ways to look at the situation. Practice first, just accepting the reality of the situation. For example my child is misbehaving right now because this is a developmental thing. That’s ok. (Step Two – Reality)
Next, think about what you want (Step Three – Aim) and how you are going to get it. (Okay, if she’s misbehaving, then I am going to stay calm and just direct her attention elsewhere).
How are you going to do this? (Step Four – choices) What am I going to distract her attention with?
Then act on your solution to your problem (Step Five – Know your plan)
Over time as you continue to practice looking at situations with this five-step process it will start to become habit that you approach challenges with this mindset.
You can see, even from that brief little example about your little girl having a tantrum that as soon as you started accepting reality, you also started to think about solutions. What am I going to do about this now that I’m experiencing this reality? By accepting this reality you have already stopped your mind from becoming consumed by the event. It is what it is, so what can I do to move pass this moment? It is a much more empowering approach.
What you will learn in this program is how to create clear aims, make decisions and implement your plans with an accurate perception of your self-worth and the true purpose of goals. This is really important information to grasp as you get back into setting goals for your life.
As you use the Mind TRACK to Happiness process more and more you will be retraining your mind not to look at everything that is wrong in your life but start to see the potential solutions to changing your life. As you keep applying this method to the day to day small things that are causing you stress, you will find that you can apply them to the bigger things in life too.
It is important when starting out with using this process that you start small. If you have severe postnatal depression, then you will have to start really small. Perhaps your first goal will be to get out of bed, shower, get dressed for the day and have some breakfast. Even if you spend the day sitting on the couch instead of being in bed, start there. Create the aim to do this for one day, then maybe two days in a row etc and work on your mindset surrounding this goal alone.
As we progress through this program in more detail, I will help you to get a thorough understanding of this process and help you to apply it to many different scenarios that occur in parenthood and with sufferers of postnatal depression and anxiety.
We will use this process to overcome:
- Behavioural and Developmental challenges with your children
- Accepting your new life as a parent
- And many more feelings and situations that you will relate to as a parent.
You will build a very solid knowledge about how to have an accurate and realistic perception of life and self-worth. You will learn:
- To accept that life does not always go to plan. That there are always ups and downs in life
- From these ups and downs we are constantly learning about life. You will learn how to look at what you are learning in a challenging situation (finding the hidden good in the bad)
- To get good at finding what you are getting instead of what you are missing out on.
- To release yourself and others from judgments and criticism with an understanding of priorities, protecting self-worth and knowing that you are always doing the best you can with the information that you have.
Over the next ten weeks you will find that the more information you receive to back up this process, the easier it will be to apply it. You will always have access to each week that you have worked through as long as you are a member, so you will be able to look back on what you have learnt if you need to.
Also remember that you have full support via our Q&A Forum and via email for sensitive questions. I am here to help you to stop doing postnatal depression and help you to apply this method to your unique personal situation.
Tomorrow is exercise day, where I will help you to begin applying what you have learnt so far into your life. Next week we go straight into looking at the first step of the Mind TRACK to Happiness process – Thoughts – in more thorough detail and using many examples from parenthood, so you can thoroughly understand how your thinking is responsible for your stress.